Tag Archives: family

15 Simple Ways to Show Someone You Care

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By establishing and maintaining a thriving support network, you can improve your own well-being. No matter the type of relationship, investing in your connections can strengthen your communication skills and help build personal resilience. Although building trust and rapport with others take time, the healthy relationships you prioritize in your life can help you navigate challenging situations and find new opportunities for growth. Whether it’s a shipmate, a coworker, a friend, a family member or someone else important to you, it is important to show others that you care about them. Cultivating strong social bonds often directly influences our own happiness.

Consider these easy ways to show someone close to you that you care this year:

Ask them how they are doing. This may seem like a no brainer, but some of your fellow Sailors may need a bit of a nudge to share something that’s on their mind. Stay in touch with family, friends and neighbors in person, online or by phone to see how they are doing. Use active listening: focus on what someone else is saying before responding with your insight and perspective.

Write them a handwritten letter. Writing a heartfelt note to a friend can brighten their day and show your appreciation for their presence in your life. Whether it’s for their birthday, or to provide support to them during a difficult time, or to thank a shipmate for going above and beyond, taking the time to put pen to paper highlights your ability to support them. Be authentic, open and emotive in your messages.

Give them a shout out on social media. For a more public way to highlight your camaraderie, give your friend or family member a quick shout out on social media. Post a picture of you with them and express the qualities that make them special to you.

Make them their favorite drink. Surprise a shipmate by giving them a tea, coffee, juice or blended smoothie to help boost their mood. Carving out a mindful moment may be just what someone needs to get through a stressful time.

Create a curated playlist. Show someone you care through creative means by making them a tailored music or podcast playlist. Consider working collaboratively with your shipmates or unit to make a list of songs, artists or podcast episodes to enjoy together.

Lend them your favorite book. If you have a book that’s impacted you positively, consider loaning it out to someone. For an extra dose of thoughtfulness, annotate parts of the book that remind you of the person or your favorite passages for easy skimming.

Send them a motivational quote. Although it may sound cheesy, passing on words of wisdom may help a shipmate have a refreshed perspective on a situation. Everyone interprets information and experiences differently, but encouraging and positive quotes may help establish connectedness.

Initiate plans on a consistent basis. Invite them to join you in a healthy activity – go to the gym with a fellow Sailor, attend a cultural event with your family or bring a friend to a cooking class for a new way to get creative. This will show them that you are committed to investing in your relationship and excited about spending quality time together.

Help free up their schedule. If a shipmate needs help caring for a baby, dog or cat, offer to take a shift so they have time to complete other activities. Even if they have not asked for help, expressing that you are available and willing to provide support will go a long way.

Introduce them to someone new. If you think one person close to you would benefit from getting to know someone else in your support network, make an introduction to bring them together. You may help foster new friendships or mentoring opportunities.

Give them a compliment. Expressing kind words is an instant way to open the door to increased positivity and connection. For ideas on how to give professional compliments to your fellow Sailors, check out this blog post.

Celebrate their successes. When your shipmate or someone else close to you succeeds, take a moment to recognize them – send them flowers, share their good news with others or treat them to something special. They will appreciate your support and feel even more confident about their recent win.

Offer to teach them something. Informally mentoring someone may help them discover new passion or hobby. If you’re an expert at using gym equipment for a full body workout or a photography pro, volunteer to show them the ropes.

Use direct language. Consider opportunities to say things like, “I’m thinking of you” or “This [event, idea, statement] made me think of you.” Showing people that you are actively taking the role they play in your life seriously is an easy way to be considerate.

Respect their need for space. If someone close to you is going through a particularly busy time or another trying life event, maintain healthy boundaries to ensure they can improve their well-being.

For additional holistic health and wellness tips for Sailors and families, visit us on Facebook and Twitter.

MyNavy Family App

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Editor’s Note: The following is a guest blog provided courtesy of Linda Jackson, the project manager at Naval Services Familyline. Naval Services Familyline is a volunteer, non-profit organization dedicated to serving Naval spouses across the country and the world. The Naval Services Familyline provides a network of experienced, trained volunteer spouses to mentor, consult and guide families in the Navy, Marine Corps and Coast Guard. For more information visit http://www.nsfamilyline.org.

Being a Navy spouse is not easy. The challenges and demands of my husband’s Naval career touched us all. No matter the length of time we have been serving or have served as a military spouse, it didn’t take long for most of us to figure out that the strength, support and can-do spirit that we bring to the table is a crucial pillar of support for the U.S. military’s overall success. It is when our loved ones are called to deploy, on land sea or air, that military spouses are called to a greater service. We bear the responsibilities of navigating the challenges at home by keeping our families “on course and speed.”

In the words of the Chief of Naval Operations (CNO) Adm. John Richardson in the release of the very first Navy Family Framework in 2017, “Navy families are an integral part of our Navy team and a vital contributor to mission success.” The CNO acknowledged the many contributions of Navy families that enable the Navy to achieve maximum possible performance. It raised the bar on the commitment the Navy has made to support our families through a coordinated network of programs, services and resources. As a seasoned Navy spouse, this was music to my ears and to the ears of the Navy spouses around me.

Or as Latisha Motley, a Navy spouse of 12 years eloquently put it, “to be affirmed and valued in our important role as Navy spouses as the highest level of the Navy organization fosters a greater sense of pride for all that we do in support of our spouses and in support of our nation.”

There’s An App For That

To help deliver on that promise, the Navy launched the MyNavy Family application (an app!) in the days leading up to Military Spouse Appreciation Day, which was May 10. The MyNavy Family app was developed by the Navy’s Sea Warrior Program (PMW 240) after the Navy asked spouses for feedback about their experiences and how the Navy could help make it better. As a result, over 1,100 spouses responded, including me, via online surveys and face-to-face and online focus groups. Others participated in an app development workshop. Many of us seasoned spouses provided our input from the lens of a decade or more of military spouse experiences.

As one of the new spouses said at the workshop, “one of the biggest things I would change is putting more focus and attention on communications with spouses and significant others during deployment.”

Another spouse said, “I can be a supportive spouse and struggle. I am not going to lie and say everything is fine. I see a lot of spouses do that because there is pressure to keep it together at home.”

The Navy wanted to get it right in developing this app, and it quickly became a collaborative effort between Navy leadership, Navy spouses and several non-profit organizations actively serving the military community. The MyNavy Family app is designed to be a one-stop shop – it curates information and resources from more than 22 websites hosting Navy and DoD-sponsored family programs. The app menu is organized into 11 milestone events: New Spouse, Mentorship and Networking, Employment and Adult Education, Parenthood, Special Needs Family Support, Moving and Relocation, Service Member Deployment, Counseling Services, Recreation, Lodging and Travel, Family Emergencies, and Transition and Retirement.

This app is great for new spouses. In addition to Navy resources, spouses will have immediate access to material specifically developed by spouses, for spouses. These helpful resources provide new spouses with downloadable guidelines and classes which encompass wisdom and guidance from Navy spouses of all levels of experience who have come before them on their journey as a Navy spouse. Experienced Navy spouses will also be well-served by downloading the MyNavy Family app. Many spouses never learn about the many available programs and resources which could benefit them and their family. This app allows access at a finger’s touch.

The initial version of the app will be primarily informational. As the app matures, interactive features will be added. The MyNavy Family app can be downloaded from the Navy App Locker (www.applocker.navy.mil). There will be a built-in feedback capability to allow users the ability to make comments on the app’s performance and to provide recommendations for improvement. We want you feedback!

More To Come

The MyNavy Family App is part of a larger effort underway to build the best Navy spouse experience through the Navy Family Framework. Other efforts include improving existing family programs/websites, providing Ombudsman registry access to command leadership spouses, increasing the availability of live webinars and self-directed learning activities and the development of an official MyNavy Family website. The official website will be tied to a CAC-less page on MyNavy Portal. Volunteer spouse teams, and several non-profit organizations, are working along-side the Navy creating responsive and useful tools to help Navy spouses experience smoother journeys ahead. Because stronger families equal a stronger fleet.

Taking Care of Yourself During PCS Season

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The summer moving season means many different stresses on military members and their families. Accessing or continuing to receive mental health services during the change of station shouldn’t be one of them. As we enter PCS season, consider these tips to help minimize stress when navigating your next move while maintaining your mental health care.

Family Members

There are many free mental health resources available to help family members. Your Primary Care Manager (PCM) is always a good place to start. If you’re not sure who your PCM is, or if you’re between PCMs due to a move, you can use the Tricare tool to find a Military Treatment Facility (MTF) near you.

For remote help, Military OneSource offers military members and their spouses up to 12 free sessions of non-medical mental health assistance through telephone, online or face-to-face counseling. You can also live chat with Military OneSource 24 hours a day.

Immediate help is also available through a variety of avenues including the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline, Give an Hour and the Real Warriors Live Chat feature. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is a confidential service from the National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH) provides trained crisis workers who can connect you with crisis counseling and mental health referrals. Give an Hour provides free mental health care to active duty, National Guard and Reserve service members, veterans and their families. They Real Warriors Campaign Live Chat offers service members, veterans and their families guidance and resources through trained health resource consultants who are ready to talk, listen and provide support.

Service Members

In addition to the resources listed above, service members can also access a wide variety of mental health services throughout the Permanent Change of Station (PCS) process.

If you’re already receiving mental health care through an MTF, ask your provider or clinic manager to connect you with the clinic at your new duty station.  Your current provider can offer a warm handoff to your new provider, which will smooth the transition from one provider to another. 

InTransition is a free and confidential coaching program provided through the Department of Defense Psychological Health Center of Excellence. InTransition offers specialized coaching and assistance to servicemembers and veterans who need care when relocating, returning from deployment or transitioning off our active duty.

The Moving Forward online course and mobile app from the Department of Veterans Affairs teaches skills to help servicemembers and veterans overcome stressful problems. The course is free and requires no registration information.

Finally, help is always available through the Military Crisis Line. The Military Crisis Line, text-messaging service, and online chat provide free support for all Service members, including members of the National Guard and Reserve, and all Veterans, even if they are not registered with VA or enrolled in VA health care. If you or someone you know is in crisis, call 1-800-273-8255, then press 1, or access online chat by texting to 838255.

More resources can be found on the Navy Suicide Prevention Branch website, including information on the “Every Sailor, Every Day” campaign.

New Training Helps Families Navigate Stress and Stay in the Green Zone

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Stress is characteristic of service in the Navy, with deployments, reintegration, and relocations causing tension for both Sailors and their families. The ability to efficiently navigate stress and build resilience is an integral part of maintaining mission readiness for Sailors and promoting psychological well-being. In addition to the stressors associated with military life, Navy families also deal with typical family stressors: raising children, maintaining their home, dealing with teenagers and handling conflicts with a spouse.

April is National Stress Awareness Month, and being cognizant of your stressors is essential. Stress can be helpful when it pushes us to make improvements in our lives. It can remind us of the importance of reaching out to others for support and helps us build resilience by growing and bouncing back from challenges. Adequately addressing stressors helps prevent chronic and prolonged exposure to stress and its adverse impacts on our health and overall well-being. Navy families now have a new training available from the Operational Stress Control (OSC) Program which offers numerous tools and resources to help Sailors and their families navigate stress and build resilience during and beyond the rigors of military life. This new training addresses the impact that stressors have on Navy families, focusing on challenges faced by Navy spouses, and their children with tips on how to navigate them.

The Navigating Stress for Navy Families training emerged from needs directly expressed by Sailors and commanders. The new Navy Family Framework recognizes the importance of integrating Navy spouses and families into education, awareness and support services and understands the role that they play as part of the Navy community. The Navigating Stress for Navy Families training is aligned with this framework, acknowledging that family readiness is key to mission readiness. The training is provided by veteran OSC Mobile Training Teams (MTTs) who have experienced similar challenges in military life. The training is modeled after OSC-required trainings for deck plate and senior leaders that are also delivered by these MTTs.

The course is an hour-long interactive conversation that provides useful and practical tools and techniques to families by introducing realistic scenarios. The course aims to improve families’ ability to navigate stress together by:

  • Helping to strengthen spouses, Sailors and, families;
  • Identifying problems with stress early;
  • Identifying best practices and further developing skills for building resilience and stress mitigation; and
  • Identifying available resources to help with stress issues.

Early identification of stress problems is vital. The Stress Continuum Model, depicted in the above thermometer graphic for quick reference, helps Sailors and their families readily pinpoint their stress “zone” so that they can take appropriate action, such as talking to a trusted friend when reacting to temporary stress. The earlier a Navy family identifies where they are within the Stress Continuum, the easier it is to bounce back. The goal is not to be 100% stress-free – as that is nearly impossible – but to learn how to build resilience so that stressors do not immediately move a family into the Red Zone. Sufficient sleep, open communication with loved ones, self-care and early help-seeking, are all ways to navigate stress healthily and lessen the risk of stress injury or illness.

Navigating Stress for Navy Families is currently available via in-person training. OSC and Commander, Navy Installations Command (CNIC) are working to develop a webinar format for the course as well. For more information or to schedule training, email oscmtteast@navy.mil or oscmttwest@navy.mil. Additional OSC resources including educational materials, policy and curricula descriptions can be found on the program’s website.

Follow OSC and the Every Sailor, Every Day campaign on Facebook and Twitter for daily tips, tricks and small acts to help you and your family stay in or get back to the Green.

Resources for Keeping Your Relationship Strong

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While many couples may have been feeling love-struck by Cupid’s arrow this Valentine’s Day, that love and affection may not necessarily mean that things are always rosy. For Sailors, the stressors that come with their Navy career can have an impact on their relationships with their significant other. Whether it’s a breakdown in communication, constant arguments, or just feeling like the spark is gone, there is always hope for rebuilding the connection and enhancing the love. Counseling can help strengthen your relationship and minimize the potential for relationship stress to impact other areas of your life and well-being.

Strengthening Relationships through Counseling

Healthy communication is a vital component of healthy and resilient relationships. The ability to express yourself clearly while also being able to listen attentively can help build trust with your partner, ensuring that you both feel secure and validated. A great setting for this communication is in counseling, where licensed therapists offer unbiased facilitation of discussion among partners to help you develop practical skills. This can include talking through thoughts and feelings, and exploring different ways to think or act in the relationship. Counseling can provide a safe space to proactively work through the challenges of a new or long-time marriage, a relationship that’s been strained by long deployments and frequent transitions, and a myriad of other stressors that Navy couples may face. Finding the type of relationship counseling or support that suits both your needs and your partner’s needs may take some work, but can ultimately lead to a stronger connection.

Counseling Services Available to Sailors and their Spouses

  • Non-medical Counseling: Short-term and solutions-focused non-medical counseling is available through Military OneSource and the Military and Family Life Counseling (MFLC) Program. These free services offer counseling with trained and licensed mental health professionals that can help you and your partner navigate a variety of relationship stressors, from reintegration challenges post-deployment, to parenting issues and more. Military OneSource sessions can be conducted via phone, secure video, online chat, or in-person. MFLC services are provided in-person, with additional resources offered through briefings and presentations on and off military installations. For more information, visit militaryonesoure.mil.
  • Counseling, Advocacy and Prevention (CAP): CAP services offer individual, group and family counseling services, including non-medical counseling and clinical counseling for issues related to the challenges of military and family life. These services are available free of charge to active duty personnel and their families at your local Fleet and Family Support Center (FFSC). A referral is not required for clinical and non-medical counseling offered through FFSCs and your command is not notified that you are seeking care. For more information and to contact your local FFSC, visit https://www.cnic.navy.mil/ffr/family_readiness/fleet_and_family_support_program/clinical_counseling.html.
  • Navy Chaplains: Navy chaplains provide a safe, non-judgmental and confidential space for individual Sailors and their family members (including spouses) to work through challenges, build connections and strengthen spiritual fitness. Chaplain care is available in-person through your local chaplain or you can reach out to Navy311 to be connected with one. The Navy Chaplain Corps also operates Chaplains Religious Enrichment Development Operation (CREDO). This program aims to strengthen spiritual well-being and individual resilience for Sailors, civilians, and families through workshops, seminars and retreats. Most CREDO sites have a Facebook page where you can find information on their program and any upcoming events and retreats that they may be hosting.
  • Medical Counseling: If there are issues with drug or alcohol abuse, physical abuse, post-traumatic stress disorder, a traumatic brain injury, or other psychological health issues impacting the stability of a marriage, Sailors and spouses can be seen by a Military Treatment Facility (MTF). A great start for figuring out medical counseling eligibility and services is to check with TRICARE (typically, a referral and prior authorization is needed), your health care provider or the Psychological Health Resource Center.

For couples who are not yet married, premarital counseling is a way to learn about communication styles, conflict resolution, and understanding one another’s expectations in marriage. Counseling for both married and engaged couples may be offered by the Fleet and Family Support Center at your home installation.

Connecting with Social Support

While professional help from a therapist is extremely useful, Sailors and their spouses can tap into the benefits of peer support from those who have experienced similar challenges. Fleet and Family Readiness Groups offer social support from other spouses who understand Navy life first-hand, promoting connectedness. The DoD Be There Peer Support Call and Outreach Center, provides free and confidential peer support to individual Sailors and family members for a range of relationship and family life issues, 24 hours a day, seven days a week. To connect with a BeThere Peer Counselor, call 1-844-357-PEER, text 480-360-6188 or visit www.betherepeersupport.org.

Reaching Out is a Sign of Strength

Your relationship with your partner can be a protective factor against stress and adversity. Remember that counseling for marital or family concerns not related to violence by the Sailor are not required to be reported when answering question 21 on Standard Form 86 (the questionnaire for National Security Positions). For more information on psychological health treatment and security clearances, check out this Every Sailor, Every Day campaign infographic.